Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Category Five

Going with the flow isn't the first words that come to my family and friends’ minds when they describe me. I like order. I find peace in well-laid plans and pride myself in multitasking to accomplish a variety of things and to keep harmony in my being.

I believe we are given situations in our life that confront our fears, test our strength and define who we are as human beings. Sometimes life lessons come in the form of a light breeze and other times that breeze blows in as a category five hurricane. My hurricane began to pick up speed that rainy fall afternoon when all was going along as scheduled. Or so I thought.

Being out of control is unfamiliar territory for me and it is a place I have fought against my entire life. In some circumstances, it has served me well and in others it has caused discord. Out of control is an uncomfortable space for me and I knew the out of control nature of what was happening was putting my baby’s life at stake. Our job as mothers is to protect our child's life, especially in our wombs. I knew as long as my daughter was in the safe keeping of my womb, I could protect her.

But what do you do when your control as a mother and our amazing God given ability to grow life suddenly flings out of control? What happens when you are completely and totally betrayed by your own body? You quickly learn you were never in control in the first place.

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